...all I can feel is the Honking!

The Mist,
the distant skyscrapers,
the honking cars
and the orange setting sun,
is all I see
when I stand at the window
of my solitude.


Now that orange has turned into red
Dark red
and it has set further,
mist-grown;
the honking is still present,
very prominently audible
from where I stand!


The perfect red circle itself
has started fading,
making it difficult to envision
the distant scrapers.
The honking wont subside
and I am still here...
staring outside the window
of my solitude.


My confidence used to be
as bright as the sun,
my dreams,
as tall as those high-rises.
The honking will never go away.
Do I stand too high
to jump and still live?




...
.....
.......




and now that it has set,
dreams - blurred,
I think I shall take the leap,
not the one of faith.
...
finally, its dark...
and all I can feel is the honking!
..................................

उलझन

कैसा उलझा सा है मन,

कैसी राह चला जा रहा है?

समंदर के किनारे पहुँच कर,

लहरों से डरा जा रहा है|

कभी सीधा, कभी उल्टा,

भागता हि जा रहा है|

चढ़ती गिरती लहरों को देख 

और उलझता जा रहा है|

खुद हि बनाये थे वो रेत के किले

जिन्हें तोड़ता चला जा रहा है| 

दूर, सबसे दूर
बहुत दूर चला जा रहा है|

दिन रात सुबह शाम 
जाने क्यूँ सोचे जा रहा है?
पागल सा होके मन मेरा,

अकेला हि चला जा रहा है|  

अकेला हि चला जा रहा है|
अकेला हि चला जा रहा है||

- नितिन विषेन

Selfish enough to be myself?

I am scared;
scared to death.
I don't know of what?

I need money,
security.
I need all that
I don't have!

I am scared;
scared like hell
I can't even listen to myself!

I just let them
do it for me.
I cant even decide for myself!

I cant speak,
cant think,
cant do anything!
You know why?
because I am scared to death!

Scared of life,
Scared of its direction,
Scared of my own self-esteem,
Scared I am!

I want to be great!
Don't you?
And I understand
minus passion
I cant be!

I think I know
what I want to do!
Then why do I waste time
doing things I don't know
I love or don't?

Will someday
I find the courage
to stand, to defy,
to reach out
and be myself!

Will someday
i do
what i want to
not for bread
not for you
for me....just for me....

Will one day
I be selfish enough
to be myself?

Will one day
I be selfish enough
and be myself?

Will one day
I be selfish enough
to be myself?

The Ghost of Television in my Life!

You know what is best about the life in hostel.....i know that springs up a lot many funny ideas in your brain but....to me and to most of my fellow hostel-mates has been the lack of television in our rooms. Its vanishing away from our lives. What I have realized over a past few months is that Television is a, pardon my language, fucking propaganda machine that is used to show what some "elites" think you would like to watch. They show what they think they can mould you into liking. They show what they think is sell-able. One might think what's the problem with that idea. "Why would I watch it if I don't like it?"....But television is not just entertainment...it is your source of knowledge, it becomes your source of ideas, it structures your vision and it directs your reckoning.

At school they run debates based on TV-shows, at homes your mom is too busy watching her favourite family soap that she starts thinking that way (many women might start thinking like those vamps in Ekta Kapoor's serials), daddy might be busy with his NEWS channel. Did you know, most of India's press and news-media runs under direct supervision of foreign-corporates and christian-churches? Did you ever wonder how did Christmas become so popular in India with just 2.3% Christians? Did you grand-father celebrate Christmas? Does you father? No. The but the covetous news channel funded by the churches and non-Indian MNCs tell you that in a glorified kind. They make you believe that it is fashionable, secular and doing so will make you look broad-minded(the man with a perspective). If you really want to be "broad-minded" go and celebrate Muharram with 13.4% Indians - the Muslims. Celebrate Gandhi Jayanti. But it seems that 2nd October is nothing but only a relieving holiday in our mundane lives. A holiday when you sit back at home and watch TV.

Why don't we read books instead? Why don't we watch our local news channels? Go and read a newspaper instead. India as a nation is wasting enough time in front of that rightly called idiot box. We watch them play cricket. C'mon get out of your room, grab a bat and a ball and play the game. I bet you will enjoy more. But what we rather do is to sit back with a cup of tea in our hands and judge those dancers competing for some stupid "India ka Dancing superstar" crown, my point here is it's far more fun to actually dance yourself rather than watching someone else become a hero.

I might have lost direction here and there while spitting the hell out against the dream-world of crores of Indians, the world they show and make you pay for wasting your time. But it is a very good experience to do things on your own rather than watching someone else do it. it is much more satisfactory to actually think about a topic rather than just watching a discussion on that topic. I am not saying that Television does not show anything worthy, it has its pros too. Still, believe me or not, the world is better without it!

Is the customer always right?

"Is the customer always right!" - Right or wrong?

Wrong. Contrary to the popular belief that this is the most catchy phrase to attract customers to be loyal to you, I believe that what this statement should be is "The right customer is always right".
The customer is the most important consideration because he eventually is your source of income, the one who writes you cheques. The notion of the customer always being right is correct when you seriously need to lure him into buying your product or services, but there always is an additional criterion of negotiation. Encouraging an abrasive customer can lower the employees' moral and zeal to deliver the best. In a high competition market this statement must be considered a guideline but not otherwise. Delivering the best service is any company's primary aim and in many cases the customer can be really wrong and you need to correct him and make him believe and develop his trust in you to such an extent that he is ready to accept your expertise as a business man or service provider, you know the deal well.

I would certainly like the customer to come to me repeatedly and this quote was designed to make them believe that we care. The origin of the phrase was in the USA where it is particularly associated with Marshall Field's department store, Chicago (established in the late 19th century).

But as I have no first hand experience in running a business so I would love to read more on this from the real experts who have a day to day involvement is customer handling......

Will it kill me?

smoke-
its hot and smoggy,
burns me inside
and then
is blown out!

the brown leaves-
wrapped in white
just
like my death-bed
wait for me!

smoke again-
makes me sleep
wakes me up
helps me think
is my friend!

the match glows
the bed reddens
the air blows
and..............
the death awaits!

yet again,
it cures my cold
and as i told
it helps me poke
the unknowns who smoke!

but i know alright
that these are no drills
when they write on it
that
smoking kills!

कुछ पल - मेरे लिए भी....

अकेला बैठा मैं ,
रौशनी से क्यूँ भागता हूँ
अँधेरे की छाओं में
-अपने आप से बातें करने को!


क्या ये ज़िन्दगी एक बोझ बन गयी है
या बोझ ढोना ही मेरी ज़िन्दगी है?


कभी रुक जाऊं, सोचता हूँ, बस खुद क लिए......
वक़्त से कहता रहता हूँ
कुछ पल, बस कुछ देर के लिए


पर कोई सुनता क्यों नहीं?
और शायद यही वजह है कि मैं...
रौशनी से दूर, अँधेरे कि ओर भागता हूँ!
____________________________


तेरी आखों में तलाशता रहता हूँ ख़ुशी
नींद तेरी गोद का गुलाम सी बन गयी है!

मैं डरता नहीं हार से, न मौत से, न दुःख से
बस जिंदा रखना चाहता हूँ
-अपने मन को, अपनी रूह को,
उस सोच को जो मुझे जीने का मक्सद देती है


चीखता रहता है मन, जोर जोर से चिल्लाता है
पर कभी कोई सुन ही नहीं पाता!


मेरे आस पास अँधेरा ही ठीक था
रौशनी मेरे सपनों का रंग फीका कर देती है!
और शायद यही वजह है की मैं.....
रौशनी से दूर, अँधेरे की ओर भागता हूँ!
___________________________
सुबह की ये किरने
टूटे हुए सपने याद दिलाती है,
और रोशन चेहरों को देख कर
मन सहम सा जाता है?

भागते भागते थक क्यों नहीं जाती ये दुनिया!
अपने काले दामन पे कालिक क्यूँ मले जा रही हैं?


मैं जो भी करना चाहूँ वो कर क्यों नहीं सकता
कभी बस सो जाना चाहूँ तो सो क्यूँ नहीं सकता
क्यों सिखाते रहते हैं लोग
चलना, जीना और मरना?


जीत जाने की दौड़ में
ऐसे लगे हुए हैं सब कि
रास्ते की ख़ुशी को तो
अब कोई समझ ही नहीं पाता!


टिमटिमाते तारों के बीच ढून्ढ लेता हूँ सुकूं
और शायद यही वजह है की मैं.....
रौशनी से दूर, अँधेरे की ओर भागता हूँ!
________________________




-नितिन विषेन